


Play Pretend - A Camp Camp Fanficion

by Froggiestarrock



Category: Camp Camp (Web Series)
Genre: Abusive Relationships, Aged-Up Character(s), Alcohol Abuse/Alcoholism, Anal Fingering, Anal Sex, Anorexia, Blow Jobs, Closeted Character, Drunk Sex, Drunken Confessions, Drunken Kissing, Established Relationship, Everyone Is Gay, Implied/Referenced Cheating, M/M, Morning After, One Night Stands, Rape/Non-con Elements, References to Depression, Secret Crush, Self-Hatred, Starvation
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2016-10-28
Updated: 2017-05-20
Packaged: 2018-08-27 14:34:06
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence
Chapters: 8
Words: 18,686
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/8405269
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Froggiestarrock/pseuds/Froggiestarrock
Summary: They are all grown up now, the used to be kids in the camp are still friends though. Everything was starting to look great for them, Neil with his great job as an scientist, Nikki with her new girl-friend and Max with his... Um... Well his life is still a wreck but at least he has his childhood friends still. But what if there was a problem, something that Max won't tell about, is making him isolate himself from the others, get wasted more often for it to be healthy and just make him not himself anymore, more fragile. All this began when he got his girl-friend, Jessica...





	1. The Girlfriend

**Author's Note:**

> They are all around the age of 27 and have they own houses. Max lives in an apartment with his girl-friend, Jessica, who is abusive, by words and fists and uses him, she is also cheating on him with a boy called Jason, he only stays with her because she is black-mailing him with his feelings for Neil. Neil lives with his cat called Blue but spends most of his time at work, which is begin an scientist, not wanting to be in an relationship because he doesn't have any free time. Nikki says she lives in the woods but she just lives in a normal place in the city, with her girlfriend, Sasha. Sorry that this sucks so much.

Chapter 1 – Jessica and Neil  
Max's POV

I have no idea why I even asked her out. Maybe because I was slight drunk at the time or I was just dumb and lonely. I guess she was nice at first, despite her slut figure with her face always full of make-up and her clothes barley covering her, her jewelry always jiggled as she walked. What went wrong? Well, as soon as she moved in, she imminently made it her place, only hers. She started to boss me around, at first I disagreed with her and fought back but then it went from just words to bruises, now I just do as I am told. I know that sounds so pathetic, begin beat up by a girl like that... She makes me feel so hopeless, she makes me so depressed that I don't eat or sleep, my ribs and bags were showing but nobody noticed, nobody ever did. She takes my money and just drinks all the time, nearly every night she would bring back a guy from the bar and I would have to leave the house so I didn't have to hear them moan. She forces me to smile in public so nobody would get suspicious, it hurts so much and my jaw aches afterwards, if only they say the bruises and pain under that smile. At least I can still talk to my childhood friends, Neil and Nikki, I guess I did have other friends but only them could make me feel so happy, even when I know that the world hates me. I'm near the breaking point to just leave this life but there is one thing that is stopping me, Neil. I love him, he just makes me smile, yet it doesn't hurt and it isn't forceful yet I can't stop. He just makes me forget that I have to go back there to her, by the time I realize, we had already said goodbye and he was gone. I'm at my home, well, just a place I sleep in really, I was just sitting on my bed, while she was in her room, moaning out a guy's name. I hated that these walls were so thin. I think the guy was Jason again, some very douche guy with tattoos and muscles, nearly 3x bigger then me, but only because I was very short, not like I would ever admit it. I think Jason and Jess were a couple, I've heard her say that name many times, I couldn't care less though that she was cheating on me, I'm glad really, she won't notice I'm gone. I stand up and head out, trying not make a sound as I close the door behind me, my hoodie stopping me from freezing to death. I look around at the winter sky, little snowflakes were starting to fall onto floor. I just start to walk, I don't know where I am going but I'm just leaving this place. I don't know how long I was walking but then all of a sudden, my phone buzzes in my jean's pocket, I have got a new notification. I take it out, as to expected, it was Jess. I sigh as I read her text message, stopping and just standing there on the empty pavement. 

'he's gone now, I want to tslk to you'

I knew that something was not right about this. She had made a spelling mistake so I take it a guess that she was very drunk, so drunk that she could probably barely stand up. I sigh and I was about to walk back but my phone buzzes again, this time it was wasn't her, it was Neil. I looked at it, surprised. 

'Hi Max! Do You Want To Hang Out? Just Us This Time, :)'

I feel myself smile as I wonder what I should do. Neil or Jess? Of course my heart says Neil but my mind is telling me if I don't go to her, she will probably kill me. But... If she was drunk then maybe she won't remember? I probably shouldn't take any chances but... I look at both text messages, Jess had messaged me again, 

'I know you read my message, why aren't you responding! >:('

I sigh and started to walk back to the familiar apartment building. When I got there, she was there, so wasted, she had this weird smile on her face as I closed the door behind me, she got closer to me, I could smell the alcohol on her. Something was odd about her, I knew what she was like when she was drunk and this was different. Then she closer to me, too close for my comfort, my back sealed to the door as she chuckles.

"Heeyy there~" she says, giggling, I gulp, I guess she just saw me as just any other one of her boys when in this state, I was taking notice of her messy hair and lustful look in her eyes, her arms starting to wrap onto me.

I couldn't take this, I wasn't going to stick around to see what would happen next as I grab the handle of the door behind me and opened it as I ran as fast as I could before her grip got tighter on me. There was no way I would just let her do that to me, she can do everything else but then act like that is evil. I slow down my pace as I realize she wasn't chasing after me, I sigh as I look down. I regain my breath, deciding that I was better off sleeping in the streets tonight. I pull out my phone, remember Neil's message. Damn, I forgot to reply, I guess that's good actually..

'yeah, sure that sounds fun, where though?'   
'Great! We Can Hang Out At My Place, If You Want...'   
'sure, i'll be there in a bit'

I put my phone into my pocket and started to walk there. The night sky was dark but the city spotlights lighted up the streets but the stars in the sky were now gone, not like in Camp Campbell where the stars shone brightly every night. I kind of miss that place. Actually, I would go that Camp then here any day, even though I would say I hated it there, I loved it so much, I even liked David and how he always tried to be positive. I was just a kid who was selfish and I broke him, I really was a little bastard... I still am really, I'm a better person though, I try not to break people this time and just try to act tough when I'm very fragile. I look around, Neil's house wasn't that far away, just a 10 minute walk. I look at it, noticing how his neighborhood was much nicer and cleaner then mine. I sigh as I go up and stand in front of the door, not sure if I should knock. After thinking for a bit, I finally knock and waited. In a minute I hear footsteps from the other side. Then the door opens and appears a smiling Neil with his black kitten, Blue, who has nothing to do with the color blue, in his hands.

"Hey Max, long time no see!" He says, leaning on the door as we both smile but then I blurt out.

"Has it really been a long time...?" I say, at this point, I'm kind of just waiting out the days that I've forgotten what month it was.

"Yeah... It's been like, a month or so since we've talked..." He says, nervously smiling, Blue's green eyes were on me.

"Really...? Wow, sorry about that... I guess I was just really busy..." I say, feeling bad as I look down.

"It's no problem, I was busy too with work and all, please, come in," He says, his voice filled with happiness, going inside.

I went inside too, standing on the door mat as I wipe my shoes. I close the door behind me and I see that Neil was already in the living room, laying on his stomach with his legs kicking the air, playing with his tiny kitten. Sometime I was very jealous of him and his clean, nice, expensive house and his perfect, little life. I look at him, I think his height has grown yet again since the last time I saw him, or I'm just shrinking. I take off my shoes and go and sit by him, looking at the small black furred kitten, who had attack Neil hand and was biting it but Neil just chuckled. I try to figure out why Neil would call her Blue but no reasons came up but I was too nervous to ask him. Why was I nervous, you ask? Well my crush for this cute, mad scientist is growing rapidly, every time I see him. I thought that in 3 months that it would be gone but it's not. I try to gain enough confidence to talk to him but the only question I have is about his cat. I try not to get close to it though because cats always give me allergies, not like I don't like them, in fact, I love cats, I love cats so much that I would risk my life for a cat, I would like tiny kittens in a little basket with a pretty bow on it but I can't, which I think is the saddest thing in the world. Finally, I snap out of my train of thoughts and I look at him.

"So... Why is she called Blue anyway...?" I say, too nervous to look at him as my eyes are now onto the cat as he shrugs.

"I don't know... It was her name when I bought her and I thought it suit her well..." he says, sitting up as he strokes her head and she let's out a quiet purr.

"Huh... So how long have you had her now? About 2-3 months...?" I say, having a guess as I look at him but he wasn't looking at me back.

"Yeah, I think so..." He says, picking her up, she was so small though that you could hold her in one hand, but then he looks at me, "Do you want to hold her...?"

"Well I-" I began, he was acting like it was his baby, except now I guess I had an allergy to babies? But then I already had a handful of cat and the kitten's eyes where on me but then she touches my noses with her paw,

"Awwwww..." I hear Neil say and I look at him, he has this smile on his face as he looks at me, making me smiles back and blush a bit but then I start to feel my allergy acting up, my nose starting to get stuffy, my eyes watering and my throat starting to feel tight.

"A-Acho!" I suddenly sneeze, startling the kitten as I shove it back over to him and use my sleeve to rub the stuff of my nose but then I sneeze again... Then again.... Then again...

After I stopped sneezing, Neil gave me a tissue, which I rubbed my nose off. I felt like shit so I groan. I look up and Neil had stood up, putting the cat away from me, frowning, so I frown too. I stand up too and he looks at me as I sniffle. I probably looked disgusting, great... Then I hear him say,

"Sorry...I didn't know..." He says, looking in my eyes with this guilty look on his face as he bites his bottom lip.

"It's fine..." I say, trying to bring that cute smile of his back by chuckling slightly as I smile nervously, trying to make mood cheerier.

"..." Neil doesn't say anything but smiles as he looks at me but then he frowns, "Max... We need to talk..."

 

Those words made my heart race, thoughts were spreading in my head, my smile turned into a panicked frown, my eyes widened and I tried to nor fear the worst. I look up at him but then he sighs and sits down, patting the seat next to him for me to sit down, so I do so. Then he began,

"There is something I need to tell you... I've been meaning to tell you for a while now... T-This is really hard for me to say but-" Then all of a sudden his phone rings, he stops and takes out his phone then started to talk to someone who sounded like Nikki, while I was left there, screaming in the inside with my impatient mind, I decide to distract myself by listening to they conversation, "Where...? Oh okay... I'll ask him... Yes, he's here... Um, Noooo... You called before I could... It's not the right time anymore... Noo... Alright, see you Nikki... Bye,"

He ended the call and put his phone back in his pocket. I didn't realized that I was staring until he turned and looked at me, my face instantly looking away with a blush. Neil then speaks up after a pause.

"Nikki wants to know if we wanted to hang out with her and Susan at this new club on Wednesday, around 5..." Neil smiles at me while he says it and I think for a minute or two about it.

"Um... Sure, I guess but I mean... I don't really like clubs..." I say, frowning, I remember the first time I went to a club, I hated the loud music, the people dancing like maniacs and the high prices of alcohol.

"Me either, but all three of us haven't hanged out together for a while and Nikki always complains that she has already been there..." Neil says, chuckling nervously.

"Yeah... I guess so... Yeah, sure, I'll come..." I say, scratching the back of my neck, as Neil takes his phone out again, smiling.

"Great! I'll tell Nikki," he says and started to tap on his phone, then I realized that I needed to tell Jess or else she will kill me, then I accidentally said.

"Yeah, great... I've got to tell Jess..." I grumble, not knowing that Neil was listening to me, I pull out my phone and scroll down my contacts until I spot her and I was a about to message her, hoping she has sobered up a bit, then Neil says.

"Who's Jess...?" I turn and look at him, he had stopped and was frozen with this look of confusion and worry, I wonder why but then I remembered that I never told them about her, should I though...?

"Um... She's my... Girlfriend..." I say, the words were acid to my mouth, especially to tell him that, to love him and then tell him that I was not single, I wonder why I haven't left her yet, then I remembered...

"Oh... Well um, I've got to go call Nikki..." Neil says in a rush tone and leaves the room, leaving me alone with my thoughts...


	2. The Breakdown

Neil's POV 

I walk into my nearby kitchen, nearly at the breaking point of tears and I lean on the wall and slide down until I could crawl into a ball. I look at my phone and change my incomplete text and type the words with my shaky hands as my tears began to fall.

'Why didn't you tell me that he had a girlfriend...?'

I place my phone of the floor and try to cry as quietly as I could because of Max in the other room, I didn't want him worrying about me.. My heart ached as it broke it in two, to know the fact that your crush will never be yours because they love someone else. I loved Max, I have for ages now, a year now actually, Nikki was the only one who knew what it and has been trying to get me to confess for a while now, actually, as soon as she found out to be honest... My mind starts to wonder.. Why didn't Nikki tell me? Why didn't Max tell me..? How long have they been a thing..? At least I know now that Max was straight.. I sniff and try to control my tears by wiping them on my sweater. I hear my phone buzz to the side of me and I see from tearful vision that Nikki had responded. I sigh and look at it,

'He has a Girlfriend?!'

So she didn't know either... Did he even tell anyone...? Did he only get a girlfriend recently..? He has been acting weird for the past couple of months but I didn't bother to notice until now. I want to just stay there forever and die as my tears started to dry up and I stopped crying but my eyes sting, along with my chest burning. I felt so done with life and tired as I stood up and sniffed. I sighed and picked up phone and used it as a mirror to see the damage my tears have left. It wasn't that bad, compared to the times that I have cried for hours on end. God... I'm so pathetic, a man shouldn't cry but I guess I wasn't a man, I was just a weak noodle. My eyes were slightly blood-shot and my cheeks were wet, which I quickly dried with my sleeves again. I then hear my notification sound and I see that Nikki had messaged me again.

'I'm so sorry... I didn't know :(' 

'It's Fine... He's coming to hang out with us on Wednesday by the way' 

'Oh okay... I'm sorry again, I know how it feels to be heart-broken, but I'm sure you'll get over him soon and meet some other guy! :)' 

'I highly doubt that I would ever meet anyone that I would love more than him... Look, I've got to go, but thanks? For actually believing that I'll be happy again. Sorry for begin such a drama queen...'

I turn my phone off and placed it in my pocket. I felt my eyes begin to water again, I growl and rub them away, starting to get angry at myself for begin so god damn weak. It was bad enough that I was a gay faggot but to be feminine and weak too...? It's just a disgrace... I was probably over-reacting about this... I try to stay positive as I remember that at least I still have him in my life. Maybe I still get him to be mine.. No... That's never going to happen... Right? Ugh! I'm even doubting myself. I feel anger grow in me, I think about how I am a disgrace and I could of done something. I could of told him my feelings and not be a introvert, shy shit and we could have been a happy couple but No! This had to happen and it's all my fault! I swing my fists at the wall, it cracks a bit but my fist hurt like hell and I'm sure was close to bleeding. I curse to myself and put my forehead to the wall, a tear going down my cheek as I sigh, letting all my anger loose and it disappears. Then all of a sudden, I hear a voice to the side of me.

"Neil...?" It was Max, he was looking at me, he had heard me and he had got worried, he looks it, even a bit scared, I tilt my head up and I panic a bit, wiping my tear away and hiding my bruised fist.

"Hey Max... Sorry that I disturbed you... I just... Got a bit mad.. I'm fine..." I say, sounding so depressed as I look at him, his look said it all, he did not believe me, I wondering what he would say as the room was starting to fall into a deathly silent.

Then all of sudden he wrapped his arms around me and hugged me tight, his face in my chest. I didn't know I was holding back any tears but I did now as I started to cry and I hugged him back. It was the nicest feeling I have felt for a while now, it was like time had stopped. For someone who claims his heart is cold, his heat made my heart heal a bit, just a bit though. I can't help but smile, but only when my tears had stopped falling. I tried not to be clingy so I let go of him but he doesn't let go of me. It was like he didn't want to let go of me... He sighs and finally lets go of me but then cups my wet cheeks and looks up into my eyes, making my cheeks blush the slightest. He uses his thumb to get rid of an remaining tear, his eyes show deep worry and concern, he really cared about me... Then he finally said something, breaking the silence.

"What's wrong...?" He asks, frowning, the tone of his voice matched his face and he wrapped his arms around my neck, making me blush harder.

"It's nothing..." I mutter out, looking down as I try to avoid eye-contact or I would break again by the look in his eyes.

"You left a dent in the wall Neil... That doesn't seem like nothing Neil..." He says, not believing my lies, I just stay silent though as he sighs and puts his hand on my shoulder as his other hand grabs my bruised one and rubs the bruise gently with his thumb and he looks down, then he adds, "I want to help you but... If I don't know what's wrong then I can't..."

"You can't help me with this problem... Because I won't let you do something that you don't want to... It's just the way you are..." I say, not really meaning to though, my voice was slightly flat as I look away to the side of me, his grasp leaving me.

"I-I'm the problem...?" I hear Max say and I look at him, his eyes were wide and hurt and nearly in tears, his misunderstanding has tearing him apart and I had to fix this as I go up to him.

"N-No! No, of course not... It's just... I'm sorry..." I say, putting my hand on his shoulder and using my other hand to grab his chin to look at me.

"...Then what is it...? Just, tell me please..." He begs, looking so fragile compared to his normal grumpy self, it broke my heart even more than before.

"I... I can't... I don't want to ruin something for you..." I admit as I bite my lip and try to get myself out of this situation.

"What could you ruin that wasn't already broken...?" He asks, trying his best to try and get me to say.

"Our friendship... Or at least I hoped that it wasn't broken..." I say and the room is filled with silence, I sigh and put my back to the wall behind me and look down and away from him.

"I'm sorry..." I hear him say as he looks in my eye or at least I think he was trying to look at me because he was going closer to me and makes it so he was in my vision.

"No... M-Max, I'm sorry... I'm begin so w-weird about all of this..." I say, trying to look away but my eyes were locked on him and my cheeks were red from the closeness of him and me.

"... It's n-not... I just... You're not begin weird Neil..." He says, struggling to find words as frowns but then smiles slightly at me and I blush more, I think I saw him blush too but maybe my vision is getting worse.

There was silence but it was as I smiled for once with him. Then all of sudden his phone beeps at him, startling him as he seemed to be lost a bit. He looks at it and growls like a wolf or such animal then looks up at me and frowns. I excepted that he had to leave or he was about to tell me some bad news.

"I have to go..." He says and looks at me like he really didn't want to though, he then sighs and smiles slightly to me,"Just call me if you need me anything okay..? I'm here for you..."

I nod and he walks to the door and sits on the steps to put on his shoes. He leaves and we wave goodbye, the feeling of regret, guilt and depression was filling me. Then all of sudden, as I shut the door, it stopped. All that was there was numbness. I sit on the couch and think. I hated to think about my problems but I did. I tried to stop but I couldn't. Then I thought of Max. His smile, his support, his touch, his personality, just him made me feel better. Maybe everything isn't so bad after all.. Not good but not bad either...


	3. The Club

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I Am SO sorry for begin so late to writing this, I've been just on writer's block for this story and I wasn't sure how to continue it but I'e finally gotten around to do it so here you go, :)

Max's POV

I drive into the dearest car-park and park there, before getting out and headed to the building called "The Machine", a dumb name if you ask me. Music was pouring out of it and it had two floors, quite bigger then I thought it would be. I walk in and try to avoid the crazy dancing people and the flirty drunk douches. The room was dark except from the neon lights spinning and the lights under the bar. I spot Neil in the corner as I would except someone like him to be and I walk over to him, he was looking over at someone. I go the side of him, the music was making my ears bleed and my head pounded like crazy to the vibrations through the ground. He spots me and smiles but there seems to be something wrong with the smile. 

He waves, not bothering to speak because it would be useless due to the noise and continues to watch this person. I follow his gaze to see a drunk Nikki with her girlfriend, who was also drunk, dancing like crazy, even more then everyone else, they looked happy. I smile and look at Neil but he doesn't look at me. Then at the corner of my eye, I spot a slut of a girl at the bar, also known as Jessica, flirting to this guy, well I think she was doing that, her mouth was moving and there was this really buff guy, to be honest who was pretty hot, sitting next to her on a bar stool. I panic and my eyes widen and I hope she doesn't see me. Neil spots me and I was presume that he would be pretty confused. I look at her and then look around for an escape, I didn't want to be here anyway. 

The only doors, that I could see, were the front door, which was blocked by dancers and the emergency door, which was by the bar she was at. I growl and I go and walk to the quieter part of the building, upstairs, the stairs were luckily Not covered in people who would decide that blocking everyone's way up by sitting on them was a good idea. I go up and nobody was there, there was no music except from the one that was from downstairs, no lights, no alcohol, it was perfect for an introvert or a person who was trying to hide away. There was few couches and sits and tables and I sit down on one in the corner and sigh, bringing my knees to my chest, this was really pathetic. I then hear footsteps and I look up to see Neil. I panic a bit but then settle down as he sits next to me. He then says,

"Max...? Are you okay..? Who was that girl..?" He says, looking concerned about me but he was asking too many questions for my comfort, especially for someone who has only known to hide your feelings deep down in you.

"I'm fine... And that girl um... She is m-" I began, not wanting to finish but then footsteps come up the stairs and appears Jess, she was about to go somewhere but then she sees me and she scowls.

"What are You doing here?" She says, with a tone in her that says that she has not had a good day, probably having a hangover, like always, as she points at me and my eyes widen and I am filled with fear, but then she sees Neil and her face softens and she smiles, "Oh, I see, this must be Neil... Sorry about that.. We're just having a little argument earlier, that's all..."

"Wait... You're Jess?" He questions, sounding quite surprised by this, how could someone like me be with such a bitch? Well I have no idea... Her face remains a smile but slightly angry that I only I could see.

"Oh... He's been talking about me, has he?" She says and looks at me with this look like I was going to die but then a male's voice calls for her over the music and she says in a cheery voice that she was coming and grabs her purse on one of the other couches, that was probably why she was here and walks back down the stairs.

"That's your girl-friend?! I mean... I'm really one to judge others by they cover but Really? I know you can do better then that... Sorry if that sounded quite selfish.." He says, looking at me dead in the eye with a serious tone in his voice before he apologized and looked away, I just put my head in my hands and sigh.

"I know... I hate it so much... I wanna break up but I can't..." I mumble out through my hands as I admit it, forgetting that Neil doesn't know about it, I guess it just rolled out, it was too late now.

"You do...?" He says, sounding slightly happy, I don't question it much as he adds to it, "I mean... Why can't you...? I've known you for nearly 17 years now and I know that you would say anything to anyone, no matter if it was really harsh, you didn't sugar-coated it either...So what's stopping you now..?"

"It's not like that, I would gladly hurt her feelings, is she had any in that soulless bodies of hers, but you see... She is um... Never mind, I'm going to go get a drink...” I mumble, I had said too much already, so I stood up and was about to leave but then Neil grabs my wrist and I flinch, pain and fear filling me as I tried to get away but it hurt so much and I was sure the wounds had opened, “Neil, let go, that hurts!”

He let's go immediately when he sees that I was right by the look in my eyes and says “I... I'm sorry... I just can't stand this anymore! I want to know what is wrong, I want to know what I can do to help! I want to be what a friend should be!” He yells and balls his hands into fist and I was speechless, I didn't know what to say.

“I'm sorry...” That was all I said before I ran downstairs before he could even say another word, heading to the bar, sat on the bar stool and said to the bartender, “Give me like... 12 shots of vodka.”

Neil's POV

Max ran downstairs and I was left alone, I really messed up this time... I walked downstairs too but I couldn't find him through the loud and big crowd. Well no Neil, it's a Friday night at a new club, of course it was going to be crowed. Why did I ever agree to this...? I saw Nikki through the crowd, making out with her girlfriend with their tongues in a drunk mess. I frown as I continued the search for my Max. I couldn't take the noise or getting pushed around anymore so I went outside which was filled with people who were smoking because they couldn't do it inside. I coughed and groaned but then I spotted a couple making out like crazy with the man pressed against the brick wall of the building but then I recognized the women, it was Max's girlfriend, what was her name again? 

What am I thinking?! That doesn't matter right now! Max's girlfriend is cheating on him, no matter if she was drunk or not, she was kissing another guy with all of her or even a bit of her consent. I feel my heart shatter as I thought about what Max would feel when he finds out about this, I have to tell him though, when I find him that is because it's better that he finds out sooner than later. I go back into the building before the “couple” see me but I think they were too busy smooching probably, I can fell myself filling up with disgust as I tried once again to find him. I noticed that Nikki and her girlfriend were gone, probably in the upstairs closet getting funky. Then I noticed a poof of black hair at the bar and my heart swells up as I knew who it was, I walked towards it and I was right, it was Max. 

I smiled wide as I sat next him but then frowned when I realized what I had to tell him. But then he notices me and turns to me and gives me the drunkest smile I have ever seen in my life. Then I notice the slightly annoyed bartender behind the bar got rid of his empty shot cup and went to get him a new one. You could practically smell the alcohol coming from inside him. My heart stops and I bite my lip as I watched my drunk friend make a fool of himself. I couldn't bare to see him indulge in his addict but what could I do?

"Heyyyyyyyy Neil~" Max shouted through the music, he was drunk off his ass.

"Wow. You really weren't joking when you said you were getting a drink..." I shouted, the music making my ears bleed and the ground thump around me but luckily I think he could hear me and I could hear him but he was slurring his words in his drunk state.

"Nope!" He says and two more shots appear at the bar for him, he downs one and hands the other one to me but I refused.

"Um no thanks, I don't drink," I say simply and push it away but Max goes on again and pushes it back over to me.

"Come on! Don't be such a sissy!" He taunts but I knew he didn't mean it as he watches me as I clutched the shot, I sighed and downed it.

All though there wasn't much of it, it burned my throat like crazy and I started to try and choke it out but it was already down my throat. Max paid the bartender for more drinks but before he could, I stood up and picked him up and carried him out of the building, I didn't want to see him like this anymore. Despite his small size, he was heavy for someone with no strength, like me. I got him to stand up but he had to lean on me to stay up. I sighed in annoyance as we head to his car, I got a ride from Nikki and seeing as she was no where to be seen, I had to use his car. I do have my own car but it was just easier at the time to go in Nikki's ride. I got his car keys from his hoodie and got in, with him in the passenger side. That's when he finally realized we weren't in the club, he really was so zoned out.

"Huh...? Where am I...?" He muttered as he looked around, a bottle of vodka in his hand, wait what? Did he steal that? I didn't even realize till now as he popped the bottle and took a long sip from it before I took it away from him.

"I'm taking you home because you couldn't even stand..." I say but then I realized as I put the keys in the car and it started, I had no idea where his house was, I never went there, he always went to my house.

"Nooooooooooo... I don't wanna!" He cried like a little child as he tried to get out, but the child lock was on, I decided that I might as well just take him to my place as I don't even think he remembers where he lives right now, so I started to drive out of the car park and to my house.


	4. The Need (NSFW Warning)

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Here's an extra long chapter for you guys. I am really prod of this chapter and not because it's gay porn. And yes, this is when Max and Neil get drunk and have mad scientist sex ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)

Neil's POV  
We went inside my house with me having Max on my back as a piggy back ride as he had pasted out in the car, cute but annoying. I put him on my bed as gently I could but he started to wake up anyway and sat up, rubbing his tired eyes like a kid, god he was cute. He yawns but then he sees me standing next to the bed and smirks, lust in his eyes and alcohol still in power of him, still drunk. I sigh and sit next to him before asking.

"Are you okay buddy...?" I was still concerned for him despite him begin drunk and a jerk for past 2 hours, he just smirked at me and took a sip of a bottle of vodka, I thought I took that anyway from him!

"Yep, but do you know what would make me feel better...?" He asks with an evil look in his eyes as he look really close to me, whispering very quietly into my ear.

"W-What...?" I ask despite my flustered, red cheeks and my nervous stutter, I had no idea what was going on or what he was about to do.

"You." He whispers in my ear as he gently placed his hand on my crotch, making me let a quiet gasp as I felt him smirk as he started to palm me through my jeans and I was about to melt into his touch but then a thought went into my mind as I gently pushed him away.

"No... No Max, stop, first off, you're drunk, you probably won't remember this in the morning and, second off, You have a girlfriend! Even if she might not be the best, you can't just cheat on her like that," I explain and he pouts and he growls before saying like he was sober.

"Even if I am drunk, wouldn't it better to just fuck me like you wouldn't be able to if I was sober? And my girlfriend, I don't give a damn about that bitch, she's already cheating me with some guy called Joey or something," He started to get close to me again but my eyes widen and I put my hands on his shoulder to stop him from getting any closer.

"Wait, you know she's cheating on you?" I ask, surprised, and he just nodded like this was as serious as I thought it was.

"Yeah, for like the past year, at least I think it's been that long, I can't remember," He shrugged and I got more confused by the second.

"So let me see, you knew she was cheating on you for nearly a whole year and you're still with her when she already treats you like shit?" I ask, more anger then confusion in my voice as Max got off me and huffed.

"It's not like I want to stay with her, she's blackmailing me and beating me up, not to mention she steals all my money and leaves me every time," He says like he was sober with an annoyed tone in his voice like he hated talking about this but I couldn't blame him but I need answers so I could help.

"What?! What is-" I was about to ask as I got more panicked and nervous but then he got close to me again, straddling me and put his finger to my lips and shushed me.

"This is a conversation for sober Max," He simply said as he whispered in my ear again, making most of my worries wash away but one, "Now we've got those problems out of the way, why don't we get to business,"

"I'm still not sure Max... What if you Do remember this? Aren't I taking advantage of you for begin drunk?" I ask and he frowns but then smirks again.

"I can't even remember now how many shots I've had so there is no way I will remember this in the morning but just in case.." He says before taking a long sip of that bottle of vodka till it it was half-empty and I just stared at him as he did so but he caught me staring and smirk and tried to place the bottle into my hands, "Get drunk with me then you stop worrying,"

"I don't know..." I say but he just waits for me, still straddling my lap as I look at the bottle, I mean, I guess it can't be that bad as I put the bottle to my lips started to down it but by the first few chugs go down my throat, burning it with it's bitter taste, I tried to cough it out but it was already gone, god I was so lightweight as I feel my head already start to spin and I feel myself lose control as I place the bottle on the ground and my hands on his waist, slightly under his shirt.

"Finally come to your senses?" He says in a taunting tone as he pushes me to the bed, pinning my hands above me as he start to trail kisses from my jaw line to my neck, waiting to find my weak spot, I wasn't drunk, no where to it, a bit tipsy at least, I was going to remember this in the morning but I didn't care, I wanted this, I Needed this, to know that he wants me too, even if he was drunk off his ass.

Then he kissed a spot that send electricity through out me and made me let a noise like a moan, so very quiet but I knew Max could hear it perfectly clear as he started to suck and lick the same spot so tenderly, even bite it once and I let out another but louder moan but I tried to keep it quiet by biting my lip hard shut but then he stopped and brought his face to mine with lust in eyes and a smirk on his lips. My cheeks flushed brighter then before because we were only half an inch apart from each other, I could feel his shaky breath on my skin and I gulped, I was getting more nervous by the second but then he quickly closed the gap between us and kissed me so passionately, making all my cares slip away, I could taste the alcohol on his lips but I've gotten used to the bitter taste so I kissed him back but rougher. 

He let out a little moan but muffled because our lips were so closed together. It felt so right yet so wrong, I couldn't even stop myself anymore like he has put me in a trance. I lick his lower lip during our heated kiss, asking for entrance and he opens wide without any second thought. I used my tongue to explore his mouthy depths, he put up a fight though, but I wasn't going to lose my dominance just like that. I moved my hand down his body until I got to his crotch and started to palm him like he did to me earlier. He moaned in the kiss and weakened up to my touch as I won the battle and put my tongue in his mouth. I went to the back of his throat but no reaction except from more exotic moaning. So no gag reflex, that might come in useful later~. 

I felt his tent in his pants grow as I touched him more through his jeans and I smirk. I could feel the adrenaline through my veins, this was like a dream, the heat coming from us was unbelievable. He runs his hands through my hair and yet we had to separate the heated kiss so we could breath and I stopped touching him, which gained a whimper from Max as we panted, I started to take his clothes off. Taking his jacket off with ease and threw it across the room to the floor, Max takes the hint and starts to unbutton my shirt with a needy look in his eyes as he eyed my pale, skinny body. He takes my shirt off as I placed my hands under his shirt and took it off and we both threw them to the floor in a bundle, not caring about where they went exactly. 

We looked at each other's bare chest and I spotted a bunch of bruises on him, I knew they were old because they were yellowy and faint but it was still a sickening sight. I bit my lip and tried to forget about it as best I could, I should just ask him when he wasn't drunk off his ass like he said himself to. Max smirks at me with his drunken look and gets close to me again. He kissed my neck again where the hickey was but quickly started to go down my body, making me let out a small gasp and a few shaky breaths. Max got to my nipples and licks it, teasing me, but he never lost eye contact with me, making my cheeks flush more as I bit my lip and looked down at him. He leave it along and starts to go further down my tingling body until he was near my aroused crotch, smirking when he saw how big it was.

I blushed hard and bit my lip nervously as he started to unbutton my jeans and pulled down on zipper very, very slowly just to tease me more. I wait impatiently, my erection begging for his touch. Max then slowly pulled my jeans off, placing them on the floor with the other pieces of clothing as he stared at my body hungrily, my boxers now the only thing covering my needy erection. He smirked evilly and I gulped as he looks up close at it, before gripping the top of my boxers and really slowly took them off, releasing my dick in the cold air. I let out a small moan as Max places my boxers on the floor but the evil in his eyes went as he looked at my thing faded away and it was now more of a look of lust or awe, amazed maybe. He got on his knees and bend down to get closer to it, before grabbing it by it's base gently, I covered my mouth to stop myself from making to much noise.

I gasp and cover my mouth with my hand to stop myself from making any noise except from muffled moans and whimpers, despite my neighbours not even begin able to hear me if I yelled as loud as I could due to our houses not begin connected, a plus to our neighbourhood I guess. He licked the tip where a bit of pre-cum was leaking and I let out a small moan as he licked it off, swallowed the bit of semen. He looked back up at me and we made a solid eye contact as he licked from the bottom to top of it with a smirk on his lips, clearly enjoying this very much. I gasp and moan, shivers crawling up my spine as my fists curled into the bed sheets, gripping it tightly, to brace myself. I saw in the way he looked at me that he liked my reaction because he then put the tip in his mouth.

Then inside his mouth licked around the tip with his tongue, never breaking eye contact with me. I moan more in pleasure, not even trying to stop it even more, I don't care who heard as I threw my head backwards against the bed frame, a pillow stopping it from hurting. Max put more and more in his mouth till it looked like his mouth going to rip open, he then started to bob his head up and down, sucking it like it was a lollipop, his hands on the remaining that wasn't in his mouth. I moaned louder, trying to stop myself by biting my lip but I couldn't as I moaned out is name in pleasure, how many times has he done this while he was drunk it get this good..? I put my hand in his hair and gripped it tight, I got returned with a surprised gasp and confusion by Max with my dick still in his mouth.

I pushed his mouth down further into my cock and I could see it go down his throat, his eyes rolled back in pleasure as he moans, sending vibrations through my dick and I moan with him. He placed his hands on the bed, gripping it tightly until his knuckles turned white as I forced his head to go up and down my dick, a slight smirk on my lips as he seemed so vulnerable, he was right, I could do anything to him. I sit up a bit with my free hand stabling me, his mouth felt so good. When I wanted to go further into this, I pulled his mouth away with a satisfying popping sound, he looked at me confused but then I grab him by his wrist and pull him up, noticing that I was naked but he was still wearing his jeans. He noticed my stare and looked down and realised, the tent in his pants for massive, it was fully hard but that was not a surprise. 

He started to unbutton his pants very slowly, begin a strip tease as he started to unzip his pants. I was not patient, my dick throbbing as it waited but soon it couldn't take anymore as he started to pull them down his knees, his bulge now bigger without the layer of his pants as he finally takes them off, placing them on the floor but his eyes never left me. I fidget in place, watching him with hungry eyes, biting my lip slightly as I looked from his bulge to his eyes, switching every second. He slips out of his boxers, placing them onto the floor and I watched him as he smirks at me and lays down on the bed, spreading his legs like a whore and I gulp. I knew what he wanted and I was not one to disappoint so I smirk back at him, lust in both of our eyes with the sexual tension in the air making us feel warm and sweaty. 

I look down on him, amazed at his body, despite the bruises, old and new, that littered his body, he was gorgeous. I got on top of him, I needed to be inside of him right now but I knew to get control of myself right now as I leaned over to my side table and got out a bottle of lube. I squirted some on my hand as Max fidgeted in his place and I decide to tease him like he did to me. I insert a finger into him, he was tight and warm and he was already moaning and gasping to my touch as I wiggled around in him. I lean down to his neck and started to lick and kiss there, before realising that Max's neck was full of sensitive spots so I started to litter his neck with hickeys and bite marks loving his reaction, to mark myself on him felt great. I inserted another finger in him, making him to get louder as he moaned out my name. 

It felt great to hear him say my name in pleasure, even if he was drunk. What I have noticed is he was full of lustful energy, he was so bashful and yet so slutty, I loved it because he was easy to please. He tensed up around my fingers as he gripped the bed sheets under him tightly til his knuckles turned white as I finished off my last mark on him on his neck. I exited him when he was fully lubricated, then I lined my dick up to his entrance while he was still panting and trying to regain himself so he didn't fall too hard in lust but then I started to enter him slowly so it didn't hurt and he gasps and starts to moan even louder then I've ever heard him, making me lose control and enter him faster and he winced but then started to pant like a dog, god he was loving this was't he? 

I couldn't wait for him to get used to me inside his small body so I exited him fast and thrusted in him and he moans so loud it was like he was shouting but with every sound he made made me lose more and more control as I thrusted in and out of him. He was so tight around my dick and I bit my lip so then I could only hear him scream out my name but I was loving this more by the second, completely forgetting that tomorrow existed or that he was drunk off his ass. I thrusted more faster and more stronger and I looked down at him and he seemed so vulnerable and small, he was lost in lust that he couldn't make proper words except moans, he couldn't even say my own name but I didn't care, he needed me and I needed him. 

I could feel myself getting closer and closer to the edge, he was tight and he kept on tensing up every thrust and the way he looked with his hands bolted to the sheets to brace himself of the impact and his tongue sticking out and his head thrown backwards made me get closer to cumming right in him. Between his moans and struggle to say anything due to begin so drunk and in lust right then, he still tried to say to me.

"Oh m-my g-god... N-Neil... I-I'm... I'm going to cum..." He pants as I thrust harder and faster till I was hitting his prostate and continued to hit it as I smirked and replied.

"D-Do you think you can hold it in a little longer?~" I said, trying not to moan myself as I got closer to my edge and he nods weakly before he moaned out gibberish again.

I thrust harder, he got louder and I ended up moaning too, going as fast as I could and as hard to make us both satisfied. I moaned out his name while he moaned out my name, we were both so close, I could feel it. I couldn't hold it back any longer as I thrust a few more times as Max came onto his stomach and a bit on the bed, after a few more thrusts, I came too inside of him. I thrust a few more lazily before exiting him and laid down next to him, we were both panting and sweating, trying to regain ourselves. Max rolled over onto his side and cuddled into me, his head on my chest and I wrapped my arm around him. Max got the blanket and put it over our naked bodies to stop ourselves from freezing but also because he seemed so tired after that and so was I. I felt my eyes slightly closing and so was his eyes as he said.

"You came in me, I can feel it trying to spill out of me... am I pregnant?" The drunkenness in him rising again as I couldn't help myself but laugh.

"No you doof, go to sleep..." I say as I chuckle and I could feel his smile on my skin as he replies.

"Fiinnee... You're the doof..." He says as his eyes close but then he says between sleepy murmurs, "I love ya..."

My eyes shot open, did he really mean that? I mean he was drunk and tired sure but he can't just say that out of the blue. As I look down at him, I realise what I had just done, I just fucked my crush, the crush I've had for nearly as long as I could remember. He was drunk, so haven't I just raped him? I tried to push the thoughts out my head as I looked away from the sleeping boy snuggled up to me. He was making small and quiet noises in his sleep but I tried to ignore them despite how cute it was. What the fuck had I done..? What was he going to say in the morning when he wasn't drunk? God... I had messed up big time. Those thoughts circled my head as I went to sleep, What had I done?


	5. The Morning After (pt. 1)

Max's POV

I opened my eyes and they instantly stung like crazy by the bright light of the sun through the curtains, my whole body was numb yet the pounding sensation in my head made me groan and wince, my mouth was dry but I still had the faint taste of vodka on my lips. How much did I drink last night? What even happened last night? I defiantly remember begin in a club and drinking a Lot but then I blacked out and I can't remember anything else. I try to get the fuzziness and static out of my head and try to figure out where I am this time. I was in a bed I wanted to go back to sleep but then I hear a groan coming from the same room as me and I realize I was sleeping on someone's chest, god dammit. Another one night stand to add to the list of the dumb things I have done while drunk. 

I guess it's not that good that I am so used to begin drunk and having nights like these but whatever. I try to get the nausea feeling out of me as I fight back the urge to throw up my insides as I sit up and look at the person who I presume I have slept with the night before to be met with an awfully familiar face who was sleeping peacefully, kind of looks like Neil... OH NO! NO NO NO NO!

"Oh Jesus Christ!" I cry out as I sit up fully and pull myself out from his grasp and grab a bunch of the covers to cover myself as I heard Neil waking up with a groan and confused sound.

"Huh...? Max...?" He mumbles as he rubs his eyes and tries to figure out what is going on but I had already started to get off the bed and tried to find my clothes to find them in a bundle on the ground, mixed in with Neil's clothes, damn it, what was I wearing last night...? I tried to reach to the closet piece of clothing that looked like mine when I heard Neil say, "Wait Max,"

"What...?" I stop, sounding so pissed off, why was I so angry? It wasn't like it was his fault but I didn't look at him, I was too embarrassed at myself for letting this happen.

"I um... Ugh! This is why I didn't want to do this!" He tries to speak but then cries out and confusion replaced the anger as I turned to him slightly over my shoulder to see him with his face in his hands.

"What are you talking abo- Oh okay, cover yourself up," I begun but then I realized when I took the covers that I had revealed him and have not notice till I spotted it and quickly looked away with my face heating up and probably really red.

"Oh right um, sorry," He says, probably flushed red too as he grabbed some of the quilt and covered his lower half as I looked back at him for answer as he sighs and says, "About last night..."

"... Do you remember?" I ask as I lay next to him, but not looking at him as he hesitates but then pauses, I could not believe this...

"I guess, you got pretty wasted back at the bar so I had to take you home but we ended up going to my house and you gave me a bottle of vodka and I blacked out and you know... Things must of exalted," He says, shrugging as he blushes and rubs the back of his neck nervously.

"Oh..." I say as I look at him, my eyes instantly trailing down to his bare chest, damn, this boy Fin- Get control of yourself Max! I sigh and add, "Can we just forget this ever happened? I don't want to lose my best friend over some silly one night stand.

"...Yeah, that'd me great..." He says, turning to me with a slight smile on his face but a blush on his cheeks, I didn't want to say it, I really didn't, I wanted to tell him how much I loved him, how much I wished I was awake when he probably fucked me good, but I couldn't, he didn't feel the same way about me and I didn't want to lose him.

"Cool, now, I can't remember what I was wearing last night and I kind of don't want to be naked anymore s-" I began, clasping my hands together as I looked puzzled at the clothes as my head pounded more but then Neil interrupted.

"Wait... Max I um... Well the thing is... U-Um..." He says as he looks at my chest, which would have made me blush, which it did for a bit but then I realized he was looking at the old bruises on my skin, the ones Jessica gave me a week or so when I pissed her off again, "Before I got drunk... You did tell me something about Jess... Is everything okay..?"

"What...? Oh god, Neil... Look, me and Jess, it's complicated, it's nothing you need to get yourself tied up in," I say, trying to think of a good excuse, I didn't want to talk about it, it was my own battle and I didn't want him to get involved.

"Max... You said that she was cheating on you for a nearly a year, you said that you didn't want to stay with her, she's blackmailing you, she was beating you up, she steals all your money and leaves you all the time, that isn't healthy, that's a full on toxic and not to mention an abusive relationship!" He says and I feel my heart sink, why did I have to go to that club? Why did I have to get drunk?

"I um...I was just drunk, how don't you know I was just making that stuff up?" I ask, trying to get myself out of this situation, I hated every second of this as my mind tried to find more excuses but I knew deep down that he was going to find out anyway.

"If it was made up then why would you have bruises on my skin?" He says as he looks back at the bruises which I quickly cover up with the quilt and I bit my lip nervously, I couldn't look him in the eye in case I broke.

"I'm an alcoholic, I get in bar fights all the time, just stop worrying so much," I say, brushing it off as nothing as I tried to keep my tone of voice kind of bored and care-free but on the inside I was panicking but then I hear him sigh.

"Do you want to know, why I worry so much? It's because I care about you, so much, but sometimes I don't even know why I even bother..." He says, venom on his tongue as he gets up and starts getting some clothes on that were on his side of the bed.

I could feel the sudden feel of regret and guilt over take me, I had a knot in my stomach, a pit in my gut, I felt sick, I felt like I was going to be sick as my head hurt more and more. I get up and put on some underwear that I think were mine as they seemed familiar but the nausea that I kept on pushing down further into me finally caught up with me as I had to sprint out of the bathroom to throw up. I kneeled down on the cold bathroom floor, the tiles digging in my skin as I threw up my insides into the toilets as I groaned and waited to see if anymore would come out. I felt disgusting and my messy mop of hair kept on getting in my face, I was a mess. I hadn't took a shower in a while or had a good night sleep for as long as I can remember. 

My mind was filled with static and everything that everyone says would just go in one ear and out the other unless I concentrate so hard and even then I don't have the energy to respond longer then one word answers or a sound and it's so tiring to just get out of bed. I was a wreck, I was lucky to have a place to sleep but I don't even feel safe there, like living with your worst enemy, there would always be tension in the air. I was trying to save up to get a place away from that witch I call a girlfriend but without a stable job and having more coming out then in, it's been hard. I can only have so many part time jobs before I either collapse from lack of sleep or I run out of places to work in the city, which ever comes first. It was cold, freezing even, and I was still practically naked right then and so I shiver as I feel goosebumps on my skin, getting some of my greasy hair out of my face. 

I hear footsteps coming closer to me but my mind drowned it out as I then see Neil standing near me but I kept my head down near the toilet so I could only see his feet. I groan and tried to get the bad aftertaste of vomit out my mouth as he leaves shortly afterwards, I could hear his footsteps and shuffling but then he returned soon later, dumping my clothes on my floor near me in a bundle and didn't even say a word as I hear him go downstairs. I felt sicker inside but I didn't throw up, I really messed up this time, he probably hates me now, he probably wants me to get changed as quick as I could and get out his house, he wants me to get out of his life. I don't blame him, I always ruin everything. When I knew that nothing more would come out of me, I turned to the clothes dumped on the floor and started to put them on. 

They smelt like alcohol and strong detergents from people around me from that club that I went with Nikki and Neil. Now I remember more, now that I've got my head on straight and I'm actually thinking, Neil had met Jess and was asking too many questions for my liking and so I walked away and got drunk off my ass with shots of vodka until I blacked out like how I always deal with my problems. So Neil must of found me and took me home, does Neil even have a car? Wait a second, where was Nikki then? I remember her dancing with her girlfriend like crazy people in love, great couple by the way, and I can remember seeing them leave, both drunk off their ass, to go do something not very child friendly in the coat closet. sSo where are they now? 

I wonder if she remembers everything about last night that that I don't, probably not but I still need to know if she is safe because I was a decent enough friend, at least I hope am. I dig through the pockets of my jeans and hoodie, hoping that I still have my phone on me and it didn't fall out or get stolen last night. Luckily I do have it but most of my money was gone, probably to buy all the drinks I drunk, and my car keys were missing too, so I think I have lost my car. Great, how was I going to get to work now? I lean on the bathroom wall and turn on my phone, sliding it with my finger to open to see my home screen, it was a picture of me, Nikki and Neil nearly 2 years ago with goofy smiles on our faces, god how time flies... I scroll through my contacts and got to N and called Nikki, bringing it up to my ear. 

It rung and rung and rung some more, I was thinking nobody would pick up which got me more worried but then somebody picked up but it wasn't Nikki but instead Lucy, her girlfriend.


	6. The Morning After (pt. 2)

Max's POV

I didn't know all that well about Lucy, Nikki's girlfriend, but I knew that she was pretty cool and butch like Nikki but less cheerful, a lot like Erid back from camp but healthier for Nikki, all I cared about was was that she was happy and she had been happier with Lucy so I already has a good vibe for her.

"Huh?" she groaned out, sounding slightly annoyed like she just woke up with a hungover, oh wait, that's probably what's going on.

"Um hey, it's Max, I need to talk to Nikki, is she with you?" I ask, kind of guilty to waking her up but I do wonder now why she had her phone in the first place.

"Um... Yeah, one second," She says and it goes quiet on the other side except from shuffling and Lucy's voice saying Nikki's name and her to wake up, after a while, another voice comes into hearing.

"Hello?" It was Nikki this time, she sound tired but not annoyed, maybe she didn't drink as much as Lucy, I would think that but she is probably just a heavy drinker because she does a lot of competitive drinking contests at bars.

"Um hey Nikki, just needed to know that you were safe after last night and not in some dumpster," I say, chuckling a bit to hide my tiredness and pain but I knew Nikki could see past it.

"Max..." She warned but then sighed and said in a calmer tone, "Max... What's wrong?"

"What? Nothing's wrong!" I say but I could feel my eyes watering as I thought of finally making my last mistake and losing Neil and my voices cracked, nearly in tears.

"Max, are you crying?" She asks with a chuckle and I whimper out barely.

"...No...?" It sounded more of a question as I wiped my eyes on my sleeves.

"Alright look, where are you? I'm coming over," She says and I panic, quickly trying to think of excuses.

"N-No! That won't be necessary!" I nearly shout but then quickly keep my voice down as I didn't want to worry Neil but I guess he didn't care about me anymore.

"Max... Where are you?" She asks but more sternly, she was also one to get what she wanted, she could get answers out of anyone.

"...I'm at Neil's house..." I say quietly and regrettably, despite the fact that it didn't sound that bad, it reminded me of what I had done. 

"Why? Did you sleep there?" She asks and I cringe inside and out as I mutter.

"I guess you could say that..." I was so quiet that I didn't even think Nikki would hear it through the phone before she says.

"What happened at Neil's?" She sounded so innocent and yet confused but I was nervous and panicked, there was no way around this.

"Welll um... I Mayyy of... had a one night stand with Neil..." I say, nervously, biting my lip slightly as I say my confession really fast, there was a silence on the other line, then laughter, I blush a bit from embarrassment as I say, "I-It's not funny!"

"Right right sorry," Nikki says but didn't mean it as the laughter died down and she said, "Didn't think your relationship would start like this,"

"Whoa whoa! We are Not in a relationship, I'm pretty sure Neil hates me now and he will never love me back!" I say with a blush on my cheeks but anger in in my voice, everyone I know is used to me begin hot tempered and annoying anyway.

"Love you back? You love him?" She asks, more curious then ever as my eyes widen as I feel my heart thumping against my rib cage, when I thought I couldn't mess up any more, I paused, not sure what to say but I guess I was so quiet that Nikki had to say, "Max? Are you still there?"

"Please... Please don't tell Neil..." I sounded so vulnerable, I hated begin so weak but I was begging, our friendship is already on thin ice, I didn't want to purposely try to break it.

"Oh my god!" She says like she was fan-girling before clearing her throat and saying,"I won't tell Neil, I promise,"

"Thank you," I say but I was terrified that she was lying but I had to trust her for now but then there was a pause and I was thinking of just ending the call but then I hear a voice on the other end.

"Wait... Max, don't you have a girlfriend? Neil said you did..." she says and I frown, Jessica was always going to catch up to me, wasn't she?

"Long story short, I do but I hate her and she is cheating on me anyway," I say, not wanting to go into detail but she says back quietly.

"Then why don't you dump her?" Her voice confused but I just groan and say simply.

"It's complicated..." She then goes 'ohhh' and I just sigh and say, "Look, let's get back to the point, Neil won't like me, we were both drunk and this won't happen again,"

"Wait, Neil? Drunk? That wouldn't happen," she says and I was immediately confused as I responded.

"What do you mean...?" More confusion spreading through me, if he wasn't drunk then he remembers last night so he could could of stopped himself from fucking me.

"Neil won't let himself get drunk, he'll get tipsy at the most but never actually drunk because he is a little goody two shoes," she explains, my mind was racing, it didn't make any sense.

"Oh okay... Well um, I've got to go, I'll call you again soon, but whatever you do, don't come here, I'm fine," I say and before she could say anything else, I ended the call and sighed, it just didn't make any sense...

I put my phone back in my pocket and get out of the bathroom, rubbing my eyes away from any tears and tear marks, I was probably a wreck right now but I couldn't get myself to look at myself in the mirror to at least sort out my bed hair because I knew that I wouldn't like the sight. I go downstairs slowly so I wouldn't creak the floor boards, I could see the door in reach. Yes, I was leaving but that was because that was what Neil would want as he now hates me, still not surprised about that honestly, the thing that I am surprised about is that he hasn't ditched me before it was too late. I was so close to the door as I walked towards it, my arm reaching out for the door knob but then I hear a voice call for me.

"Max? Where are you going?" It was Neil, I gulped and turned around hesitantly at him, he was eating some cereal, leaning on the door frame to the kitchen on the other side of the living room but walked up closer to me, "Leaving so soon?"

"Um yeah, got to get home before Jess blows a fuse," I say simply but I was lying, she was probably in a stranger's bed or pasted out on the couch, not wanting to go far into it so I didn't let him see how much I was hurting.

"Oh, well you're going to need these then," he says and goes through his pockets and throws me my car keys with his spare hand, which I caught in mid air and I looked at them in the palm of my hand before chuckling slightly and saying quietly under my breath.

"I thought I lost these," Neil heard it somehow, probably because of his big, nosy ears, and chuckled, Blue his cat waking up from her nap on the couch was now in between my legs, I tried to shoo her away by pushing her with my foot gently as I feel my nose start to feel tingly.

"Well Nikki was my ride home last night but as I couldn't find her and had to take you home anyway, I took your car, sorry" he says with a slight smile on his lips, shrugging slightly but I just chuckle and say back.

"It's fine, it's better then having it stolen or lost I guess," He started to eat some of cereal as I looked down at my car keys before turning to to Neil and saying, "Maybe Jess won't be too mad if I stayed, it's not like she cared much about me,"

"Mmm mm?!" He says with his mouth closed as he was eating and wasn't trying to be rude before swallowing, he smiled wider, you could see stars twinkle in his eyes, god I was so gay for this man, He cleared his throat and said, "O-Oh yeah that is um... Cool, I guess,"

"Ha ha, alright then, by the way, I talked to Nikki on the phone a couple of minutes ago yo see if she was okay and I am kind of worried she might come over here so be prepared," I say and he looks at me confused before I sighed and said, "Never mind,"

"Um alright then, do you um want something to eat?" Neil asks, gesturing to the kitchen nervously, god he was a dork, an adorable dork, I simply nod as he walk into the kitchen, Neil sitting on the counter as I opened up the fridge for something to eat.

I look at the rows of food and I hear my stomach grow, louder then it should. When was the last time I ate? I can't seem to remember at all, I don't think that was a good thing but as I look down at my stomach and see how not flat it was, it made a knot in my stomach as I closed the fridge door. I had lost my appetite, if I wanted Neil to love me, I've got to look good, I'm pretty lucky that he didn't see see my fat body while fucking me but then I remembered what Nikki had said, he never got drunk. I sat on the counter with him, struggling a bit due to my short size and he looks at me, confused as I bite my lip, nervously. I tried to say something but Neil beat me to it as he placed his bowl on the side and crossed his legs.

"You're not going to eat?" He asks and I just shake my head, not wanting to go into how fucked up I am and he nodded, we didn't look at each other, it was so awkward.

"So... Nikki told me something on the phone," I say, breaking the silence and Neil looks at me with a gentle smile, curiosity on his face, and making me feel a bit guilty for doing this, "Apparently, you won't let yourself get drunk, so that made me wonder, if you weren't drunk yesterday then why did we have a one night stand...?"

"N-Nikki said That...?" Neil asks, his eyes widening as he panicked on the inside, frowning and he bit his lip nervously, I frown and narrow my eyes at him, making him more nervous, "Well u-um you s-see... I-I um..."

"Neil, be honest with me, were you or were you not drunk yesterday?" I ask and for a while, Neil didn't any a word, just looked at his lap while twiddling with his thumbs before sighing in defeat and saying, not looking me in the eye.

"No, I wasn't drunk, I was definitely tipsy, maybe on the verge of drunk but I wasn't really as I had full control and remember everything," he confessed and my eyes widen, I wasn't angry, surprisingly, I knew I should be but I wasn't at all.

"If you had full control then why even was there a one night stand?" I ask, and he tensed up, not looking at me in the eye like he was afraid of how I would react, none of it made sense, I wait for a response, which felt like years but then he said.

"I... I don't know, I just don't know, I was stupid and wasn't thinking at all," he looked so distraught, depressed, it broke my heart but he deserved it one way or another.

"Clearly," I said, bitterly, running my hand through my mop of hair, not looking at him but as I hear him sigh in defeat, I feel a bit guilty, so I add, "Look Neil... We were both not thinking last night, we both did some really dumb things..."

"Yeah... So do you just want to forget all about this?" He asks and I freeze up and think, I wanted to say yes to save our friendship but I also wanted to say no, I had no idea why.

"I don't know... Do you?" I ask, finally looking at him in the eye, I could get lost in those sea blue eyes of his, I tried to keep control of myself as I watched him pause before muttering, barely audible.

"I don't know either..." There was an awkward silence as he looked away from me but I was getting inpatient so I grabbed his chin and made him look at me.

"Neil, I don't remember what happened and I'm still trying to understand really but all I know is that I don't want this to... tear us apart..." I say, slowing down as I looked into his eyes and he looks into my eyes, never leaving the eye contact, but I was blushing, seeing how close I was to him.

I started to lean closer to him and he started to lean closer to me, the hairs on my skin stood on end, it was like everything was going in slow motion. My eyes go half-lidded, my hand around his neck and his hand on my side, we were so close that I could feel his shaky breath on my skin, I leaned in closer, I didn't want this to stop yet it felt wrong but that adrenaline of it made me want to lean closer. Neil's hand trailed to my side up to my cheek and I could take it anymore, I closed my eyes and closed the gap between us, our lips crashing together, electricity struck through me, my heart was pounding, my head was spinning but I didn't want this to end, It felt so good. Neil didn't push me away but didn't move, like he was frozen before softening up and made no space between us. 

The kiss lasted forever but was so blissful and was getting rougher and more sexual and we only separated when we both were gasping for air. I looked down, removing my grasp from him and he did the same, my heart was still pounding and I ended up smiling and looking at Neil, resting my head on his shoulder.

"Well, I have no idea where that came from," He says after regaining his breath and I chuckle, so love-struck, this felt like a dream but no matter how much I pinch myself, I wouldn't wake up, this was real and that made me smile wider, a bright blush on my cheeks.

"Yeah... Hey Neil..?" I ask, a question pondering my head, "What are we now...? Friends with benefits...?"

"I don't like that label... But there is a label I do like," He says, chuckling nervously as he smiles, a blush started to form on his cheeks.

"Oh? What's that?" I ask, looking at him, confused but he just smiles, looking away from me.

"...Boyfriends..." He says and I pause before smiling and put my hand over his.

"Yeah... I like that label too..."


	7. The Plan

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This chapter is just a filler really and it's really dull, sorry, but don't worry, the next chapter is sure to be interesting! >:)

Neil's POV

"How long have you loved me?" Max asked, we had left the kitchen and sat on the couch, we decided to ask each other questions as there was so many unanswered.

"Since... Forever, really. I think I fell in love with you in middle school, when we did that school play and ruined it for everyone with that prank with the sprinklers turning on and drenching everyone, we thought it was hilarious and you laughed till you started to snort," I say, recalling the day like it was yesterday.

"Oh yeah! I remember that, we got suspended for a whole week! That was so ridiculous, the headteacher at that school was evil," He says, chuckling but then frowned and thought for a minute and said, "That was 14 years ago! How did you keep a secret that long!?"

"It was hard I guess, I mean, it started off small but I learned to control it, I was surprised you didn't notice," I say and Max looks down at his lap, thinking, so I add, "It for easier as I got older as I realized that it just wasn't going to happen..."

"Neil, I'm so sorry I put you through that, it was hell for me and I only had my crush for a year or so, and after you heard that I got a girlfriend, you must of been heartbroken, that's why you acted like that... Isn't it...?" He asks and I just nod, not wanting to go any further so I changed the subject.

"So when did you get your crush for me...?" I ask, sitting up straight and clearing my throat and he just chuckle and run his hand through his messy hair.

"Well, like I said, it was a year ago at that party at Nikki's place before she moved in with Lucy, we were all drunk or tipsy and I was watching you dance in the corner of the room, I thought you were pretty hot then but I just blamed it on the beer, I think it took me a whole week just to come to terms that I liked you," Max said, a smile spreading on his face.

"I knew you were acting weirder then normal at that party!" I say and I laugh as I look at him, a smile on our faces but then a thought came into my head that made me frown.

"Max? Why do you stay with Jess...? She uses you for money and she will keep on doing it until you're broke, you know that right?" I ask, I hated the thought of Jess and Max, and the things she was doing to him, I wanted to know why he stays, it's not like he loves her and she defiantly doesn't love him.

"Well, it's pretty complicated, one reason was because I have no money to get a place to stay because there was no doubt she was going to keep my place and also because she is blackmailing me with every single secret that I haven't even told you yet," he says, a frown on his face.

"Wait, what secrets now?" I say without thinking before realizing my wrong in that question and I tried to fix It by saying, "Actually never mind, sorry, that was a bit selfish, also if you guys break up then you could always stay with me,"

"First off, it's fine, you have every right to be curious, secondly, I shouldn't be a burden, I don't really have much money to to pay rent or something and I can't do much much in return," he says and my heart sinks, why would he think like that?

"Max, you're not a burden, you don't have to pay me anything back, I don't mind, you can stay with me for as long as you want," I say and Max's eyes widen before saying in a panic.

"I really can't do that, the guilt would kill me, I guess I can stay with you until I can afford my own house but I am 100% paying rent... as soon as I can do that, that is..." he says, muttering the last part but I heard it loud and clear, I frown, there must be a way to meet midway...

"Well how about you stay here as long as you want and only start paying rent when you can, okay?" I say and he frowns and thinks for a minute before saying.

"This really is too much to ask-" he was pretty unsure but I interrupted him by saying sternly but with concern in my eyes.

"Max, it's fine, I would do anything to know that you won't be hurt and that you will be okay," Max looks at me with surprise for a couple of seconds before smiling and hugging me, his face in my chest, it didn't take me a second thought to hug back, I hated seeming like this, feeling like he was bad, like he was nothing, the hug didn't last long unfortunately as he let go and said.

"Okay, I'll go with that but that means I'm going to have to go back to my old house to get some clean clothes which means I would have to see Jess and tell her and I don't know how that will go down..." He sounded anxious, looking down at his lap as he bites his lip till it was nearly bleeding, he really didn't want to go back but I just put my hands on his and say.

"It's going to be okay, if you want, I can go with you and I'll make sure she won't lay a finger on you," I say and he frowns but then looks up from his lap and into my eyes, we were close and Max didn't say anything before bringing me into a gentle kiss.

Our lips shortly touched, his arms wrapping around my neck and he smiled and kissed me again but rougher and I couldn't help but melt into the touch and wrap my arms around his waist, pulling him into my lap. I could feel his smirk in the kiss as he straddles me, leaning me back onto the couch, escaping the kiss for a few seconds to catch his breath before slamming his lips back onto mine, licking my bottom lip seductively and I open up, he was so dominate but it felt forced, like he was doing this because he felt like he had. Our tongues intertwined, the kiss getting more rougher and lustful, when he exited to breath, a trail of saliva was between us.

"W-Where did that come from...?" I pant out as we both smirk and he started to trail kisses to my jaw line to my neck and probably had seen the hickey on my neck where my most vulnerable place was because he was kissing there a lot, making me having to bite my lip to stop any noise.

"Don't know, don't care..." He mutters and started to use his hands under my shirt and started to take it off but I was thinking and I stopped him, pulling my shirt down and sat up so I was face to face to him, he looked confused, but I need to know something.

"Max, are you only doing this so you can get out of going to your own house...?" I ask and Max's eyes widen before he sighed and got off me, I waited for his answer but he didn't even move and I was about to say something when he says.

"No, maybe... Yeah, sorry, I just don't want to go back to her, I have no idea what she will do and I don't want you to get hurt too, I swear I would kill myself if you even got a scratch because of me," My heart breaks, crumbling with every word, I wished he didn't feel like this, sure I knew he was cynical, he always have been except he wasn't joking when he made his suicide joke this time, no smirk or joking tone.

"Max... Look, it's okay, you don't have to be afraid anymore, I can't make you do anything but do you really want her to win? There is no other way around this and you know it..." I say, trying to convince him yet if it was my choice, I wouldn't let Max even be the same county as that witch.

"... Alright fine, I'll go but please don't come with me, okay? I don't want you to get hurt..." he says and even though I was hesitant, I nodded and he smiled, muttering a "Thank you..."

"No problem, now, do you want to go now or later..? Because I guess we could watch a movie or something, if you'd like..." I said, shrugging slightly, not getting my hopes up as I smiled at him and he smiled wider, nodding.

"Sure, anything is better then going to her again," he says and I smile wider, I actually just wanted to forger about everything for a bit, take a step back because I was starting to get a headache trying to figure out what has happened happened the last couple of days.

We both stood up and chose a movie together, we ended up picking one of my all time favorites but one that Max had not seen yet. We cuddled up on the couch and hit play, I didn't pay much attention to the film most of the time but on Max, who was resting on my shoulder with his arms wrapped around my torso and my arm around his shoulder. Max was too invested in the movie that he luckily didn't notice me staring down at him, I wanted to protect him, the grumpy cinnamon roll, and he's all mine. I still couldn't believe that we were finally going out, it felt felt like a dream, so surreal, but I couldn't pinch myself awake. I was worried that Max might get hurt while at Jessica's, terrified even, but he said to not go with him and I don't want to break his trust at all.

I look at the screen as an intense part came on, the battle music alerting me suddenly. I tried to forget about it, just forger about it all, it didn't matter anymore, I've finally got Max and for right now, we are happy and that is all I should care about, I think it's called living in the moment. I hold onto him tighter because I really don't want to lose him and Max tightened his grip because something in the film scared him, I think I calmed down then, knowing everything is okay as Blue, my cat, circled into my lap. The movie was almost over, Max was barely awake, which was a bit weird as it was still morning practically, did he ever get any sleep? When the credits started to roll down the screen, I nudged him awake and he stirred up with a groan, holding onto me tighter.

I chuckle before having to tear his grasp away which make him groan louder. He finally woke up, rubbing his eyes and sitting up, he then sighed and stood up, stretching shortly before turning to me, I could not get up because Blue was on my lap and I didn't want to wake her. Max just chuckled and strokes her, ignoring his allergies but then he sneezed, waking Blue up with a jump, he groaned and wiped his nose on his sleeve before saying.

"I better go, my stuff isn't going to go get itself, no matter how much I wish..." he frowned but tried to joke to not make me see how much he didn't want to go, I saw right through it.

"Um yeah... Be safe, please," I say, not wanting to let him go but I knew it was for the best, he frowns and pauses before chuckling and saying.

"Hey, don't worry okay? Maybe if I'm lucky then I won't see her at all!" He jokes as we grabs his shoes and jacket and puts them on, I just stare, biting my lip nervously, wanting to stop him but I couldn't, I was like a statue.

"Heh, yeah... See ya later," I mumble and he waves goodbye as he goes out of the front door and it closed shut, he was gone but I couldn't tear my mind off the idea of Max hurt or even worse de-... I'm over exaggerating, of course Jess isn't going to do that to him, I doubt she will even see him... I hope.


	8. The Return

Max's POV

Before I left, I grabbed my backpack and and a scarf, the bag because I needed something to put my stuff in and the scarf because it was freezing outside due to the winter season and also to cover all the hickeys on my neck and shoulders from last night, oh how I wish I remember, I want to know what it felt like so badly, but seeing as my ass still hurts, I bet it was rough, which makes me want to remember it more. I began to walk to where my stuff is, where Jess it, with no money in my pockets for a taxi or anything, I didn't even have my phone on me as I had left it on charge at Neil's house, god I was so stupid. I continued to walk, it was already too far to go back, I was like a zombie like everyone else and it was like I had no control of my own legs, no one luckily gave me a second glance. 

I sighed as I see my old home in view, I take the bobble, that I always have, out of my pocket and tie my hair back in a man bun, yes it is that long, I should get a haircut... Anyway, I reach the house and take out my key and put it in the lock, I hesitate to open the door but I took a deep breath I did and walked it, it was the same as always, empty beer cans and bottles on the ground, dishes that desperately needed to be cleaned in the sink, piles of unclean clothes in nearly every corner and dust on every book and shelf, I don't even think I have even noticed how bad this is until I saw Neil's house, like I was so used to every thing begin like a bomb had hit, only cleaning the dishes or clothes if we ran out of clean stuff of that, has it always been like this? 

I spot Jess passed out on the couch, an empty bottle of vodka in her hand and her mouth wide open, drooling, her clothes covered in stains and whites stains were on the couch, gross, so fucking gross. I tip toe silently past her to my room, not wanting to wake her up as I would have no idea what she would do and stayed quiet when I got into my room, closing my door silently and let a breath out I didn't know I am letting in as I took my backpack off my shoulder and placed it on my unmade bed and opened it. I opened up my drawers and put all my clothes from there to in there, picking up my unclean ones too, I could always wash them. Doing this made me realize that I did not have many clothes, I guess I did not have much money to go spending on clothes.

I take everything that would fit in the bag that I needed, I wanted to make sure I would never have to go here again, see her again, be anywhere near this place again. I close my bag shut and open my bedroom door, I could see the front door in my view, I was so close, I was concentrating on getting away that I didn't realize that Jess wasn't sleeping on the couch anymore, she was gone. I then felt someone push him against the nearest wall, it was Jess and she was furious and clearly had a major hangover, which is a Jess you did not want to see. I panicked inside, guess I wasn't getting out of here unhurt. I gulp, my heart was pounding against my rib cage, I could feel my palms getting clammy.

"So, where have you been?" She practically growls out, I could smell her last cigarette in her breath as she pins me to wall,she may be a bit shorter then me and skinnier but she is sure as hell stronger than me, I didn't eat much and she worked out everyday.

"At Neil's house, calm down, it's not like you care," I say and immediately regret it as she slapped me, the burning sensation in my cheek as I held made me remember to shut up my stupid mouth.

"Who the hell do you think you are?!" She yells in my face and I wince, my head was ringing as she bashed it against the wall, her hand on my neck, I say nothing.

"... you're pathetic..." she says and let's me go, I fall to the ground, my back to the wall as I bring my knees to my face, I wanted to cry but I couldn't while she was here, she made me feel so small but then she sees my backpack and glares at it.

"What's this for?" She says as she snatches it way from me, I tried to find It off her but she kicked me in the face so I stopped trying completely, I hear the zipper and she pours the entire contents of the bag on the floor.

"What is all your stuff in this bag? Are you... moving out?!" She says, taking her a few seconds to just figure it out and she gets she gets madder by the second as she yells the end.

"You're running away from me, aren't you?! What? Can't little Maxy take a little bit of yelling from a girl?" She says in her baby voice as she drags me back up to my feet by the collar, I say nothing, she growls.

"You're so stupid! Do you really think your strong enough to live in the streets? You can't even fight back a girl smaller than you!" She yells and goes to grab my neck but the scarf I was wearing was blocking her so she ripped it off me and saw the hickeys Neil had left me, she smirked.

"Oh I see what's going on here, you're Neil's new boy toy, aren't you? Well I've got news for you faggot..." she says before slamming me back onto the wall, her hand gripping my throat until I was croaking for air, desperately clawing away at it to go away.

"Neil won't let you stay for long, as soon as he gets bored of you then off you go to the streets, you'll Have to crawl back to me but trust me when I say that when you leave now you are never coming back," she growls in my ear, I was struggling to keep conscious as tears pricked the edges of my eyes before she let me go and I fall to my knees.

"He's going to find you either annoying or fat or worthless or maybe even a burden or a leach, what ever comes first," she says, listing off my imperfections as I try and catch my breath, tears streaming down my face, I say nothing.

"So yeah leave, in a few months or even weeks, you'll be homeless, did you really think that he would love you...?" She says as she kicks my face again, right in the eye eye and I couldn't open it back up again but I could see with my other eye her leaving and I couldn't be any more relieved.

I then started to sob, gross sobbing into my hands, I was in pain, mentally and physically, I tried to catch my breath but my throat felt so sore and my eyes burned. I look at the bag, I felt empty, I felt gone, I felt like I wanted to end it all, I wanted to die and end this pain, but there was one was one thing stopping me, Neil. I loved him but even if he says he does, I can't help but believing her, he'll get bored of me sooner or later so I've got to keep him entertained, I've got to keep thin, I've got to be perfect for him if I want him to stay so I can't make him worry or mad. It may seem like a bad relationship but he's worth it. I started to pack my stuff back into my bag after I stopped crying and regained by breath finally. I wiped away the tears and snot with my sleeve and I zip up my bag back up as I place the last item back into my bag. 

I throw it back onto my shoulder and open the door and leave, the winter air was freezing and it was already slightly dark because of the season. I put my hood up and began to walk back to Neil's house, it began to rain, it first started as just spitting but then it started to rain hard, like bullets or hail so I began to fasten my pace, then it was a jog and then a run, I just wanted to go home, I just wanted to be safe. I could see his house in sight, I was so close. I walk to the door, I could see light from inside, just a little bit further. I knock on the door because I didn't have a key yet to the house, I feel my head spin, I felt like I was going to throw up, I was going to faint, everything was dizzy and blurry, stay awake for a bit longer, I'm almost there.

The door opens and I see Neil through the blur, I tried to snap out of it but I then felt my eyes droop and everything was darkness as I fell. I don't even know why, many because I don't sleep well most nights or get no sleep at all or maybe it was because I have not drunk or eaten anything in 2 to 3 days or maybe it was pain she brought me, my body was sore yet numb and my face burned like crazy, I just want to be okay, I want to be normal, I want to be useful, I want to smart, I want so many things, I was greedy and I know it. Both I know it, I'm waking up to me on the couch, I recognized it as Neil's so I knew I wasn't there anymore. My head hurt like hell and I groan in pain but then I heard talking from the kitchen. I sit up, a blanket was on me and it was now dark outside.

I could hear a voice I recognized as Neil's instantly. I still felt groggy and terrible but curiosity got the best of me and I stood up anyway and abandoned the blanket to the floor but I immediately regretted it as it was freezing. I walk towards the kitchen and peered in, Neil was on the phone with someone, he has not noticed me as he had his backs turned away from me. I waited as he ended the call, saying goodbye to the person on the other line and sighed but then I cleared my throat loudly to get his attention. He turned and saw me and his eyes widened, I had a lingering fear that whoever he was talking to, probably Nikki, were talking about me so I cross my arms in disapproval and scowl at him.

"So, what's going on?" I ask before sighing and calming down, I didn't care enough to get mad at him, what would I even get mad at him for? He has does nothing wrong ever to me or anyone.

"You're awake!" He says, it was like he was in disbelief, he was smiling wide though, but then he frowned and said, "After you fainted, I was so worried, I had no idea what had happened or w-what to do or..."

"Neil, calm down, I'm okay, right? I'm right here," I say as I go to comfort him, hugging him tightly as I look up at him, weird really, I'm the one who got beat up by my girlfriend and I'm the one comforting him.

"Yeah, you're right..." he says as he looks at me but then winced as he looks at something on my face, it took me a second to remember that I probably have a black eye after what had happened with Jess.

"...So I guess you've already guessed that I was unlucky enough to run into Jess when I got there, she didn't really like that I was moving out..." I say, nervously stretching my back of my neck, a pained smile on my lips.

"Max... I knew it was a bad idea to send you there, I'm so sorry, I shouldn't of made you go," he says, the guilt in his voice so thick and he hugs me right like if he would let go I would disappear.

"No no, look it's fine, you were right, I needed to go anyway, I've got my stuff so I don't need to go back ever again to that place, okay? Everything is fine now, I'm here, I'm right here..." I say, chuckling and smiling and he smiles too as I hug him back, we stay like that for a while, the ache in my body didn't matter, nothing mattered anymore.

"I'm so fucking glad," He mutters and I chuckle.

"So am I..." And I was finally happy.


End file.
